Day 71. A Review and Response
Not all treasure is silver and gold, mate.
Captain Jack Sparrow, Pirates of the Caribbean,
Walt Disney Pictures, 2003
Today will run long. Before going forward, we need to look back and remember.
THE TABLE OF SELF KNOWLEDGE
In the first 30 days of this novena we examined the allegory of the Table of Self-Knowledge. We gained insights as to why our inner life can be so shaky and unstable. The three-legged table resting on sand is an image of a life not grounded on the Cornerstones of Christ. Recall that we used our negative emotional reactions to people and situations as helps in our exploration. These reactions, we discovered, are a means of discerning the ground on which our three pillars, Sense of Self, Source of Love and Hope of Happiness are really resting (as opposed to where we’d like to think they are). We went on to begin the process (it will take a lifetime) of identifying and removing the intervening sand, clay and stones of false foundations so that we could set our lives firmly on the three diamond Cornerstones. The first, which grounds our Sense of Self, is our identity as daughters and sons of God the Father. The second, establishing our Source of Love, is the Father’s love. Third, making our Hope of Happiness secure, is God’s will which we embrace in the short term in order to lead us to the long term goal of heaven. We learned to adjust our pillars by recognizing our prioritizing choices and making better decisions to obey the Father; placing faithfulness to his commands above our own preferences.
We also examined our Habits of Sin – those cracks in our tabletop that become trenches as we continually give in to certain temptations. We looked at ways to fill in those trenches through the grace of repentance, faith and growing in virtue. In connection with this we recognized the role of Hurts (those strange iron balls) that, chained to our memories, can wreak havoc at our Level of Awareness. Sometimes, we saw, our Habits of Sin are deepened by our desire to escape the destructive, painful presence of these iron balls. Finally, we saw that Jesus has a plan for our life that includes not only the healing of our hurts (a fourth pillar), but the transformation of our inner pain into a sharing with his redemptive suffering. In this sense we saw that the Table became an Altar – a privileged place of sacrifice. Here, in our inner being, we make a daily offering of ourselves and our hurts through Christ to God the Father for his praise and glory.
THE TEMPLE OF RELATIONSHIPS
The second part of the novena was the analogy of the Temple of Relationships. After carefully studying the divine blueprint of the tabernacle – revealed to Moses on Mt. Sinai as an exact replica of the heavenly temple – we examined our own patterns of relationships. We considered the poor models for relationships offered us by our modern, deconstructed culture: malls or walls. Malls, you recall, allow too much access and place everything on display with few secrets and no sense of modesty. Walls lock us away in isolation and fear because once having allowed too much access, we recoil in fear and permit too little.
Intimacy (“Into-Me-See”) – access to the depths of our inner person – is not to be lightly granted. Seeing that God, who is all-loving, still bars access to his sanctuary and chooses with great care whom he will admit, we realized that we too must be discerning in letting others in. We rejected the “profit-motive” in our relationships – that tendency to approach others with a desire to use rather than to love. Finally, we applied the temple layout as a guide to restructuring our own patterns of walls and gates so that we could more carefully decide whom to allow within.
We saw that the critical relationship around which all others must be formed is the communion of Ark and Altar. The Ark, the footstool of God, represents the Lord’s kingly reign in my life. The Altar, as the central aspect of my being, is the core of my body-person, and is daily attending to the Lord in love and sacrificial self-offering. From here all of our other relationships – from strangers to acquaintances to familiar friends to faithful friends to “the One” – can be rightly arranged and more wisely managed.
WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE?
The Table, therefore, is you. So is the Temple. It will come as no surprise, then, that the Treasure, too, is you. My sincere hope is that you have gained some sense of the wonder of your own being through this Novena. Created in the image of the Father (Genesis 1:27), exalted above every other creature (Psalm 8:6f), you are fashioned with infinite care and attention to detail (Psalm 139:13ff). You are not disposable. You are not replaceable. You are not worthless. You are awesome.
Furthermore, you have been bought at a great price “…ransomed from your futile conduct…not with perishable things like silver or gold but with the precious blood of Christ” (1 Peter 1:18,19). Though we, the human family, have fallen in sin (Rom. 3:23), the eternal marvel of our faith is that God sent his only Son (Jn. 3:15, 16), born of a woman (Gal. 4:4), born with a body like ours (Hebrews 10:10), to ransom our souls (Titus 2:14), redeem our bodies (Colossians 1:22) and win for us an eternal place in heaven (1 Corinthians 15:51-52).
Here’s our problem: we hear these truths repeated so often that we become deaf to their profound meaning. The flesh is sluggish and the mind is dim when it comes to spiritual things. We don’t see clearly the magnitude of the gift, so we tend to treat it casually, think of it little and presume that heaven, for us, is an easy “in.”
But this approach leaves a critical element “out.” Our response. How will we respond to the enormous gift of life and the amazing gift of salvation? Mind you, we can’t repay the gift. It is freely, generously given. It cannot be purchased through some action or initiative on our part. It can only be received with gratitude and praise.
Once received, however, the gift requires a response. Recall that in our Temple of Relationships we were mindful that every relationship is a two-way street. Trust calls for a response of trust, self-disclosure calls for self-disclosure, self-gift calls for self-gift. You would hardly marry a person who says to you, “I’ll be married to you, but don’t expect me to trust you or tell you anything about myself.”
As we learned in our definition of vocation, the word for this mutual giving is reciprocal. Mutual love is expressed in reciprocal giving. Not tit-for-tat; not keeping score, but total, generous giving. Marriage, for example, is not a 50-50 arrangement where each partner gives half. Marriage is 100-100. Both give all they have. If some happen to be able to give more, so be it, but each gives all.
“That sounds nice, but does anybody really live that way?” This description of relationships can seem like something unreal. Ironically, the opposite is true. It is the Most Real. It is found most clearly within the life of the Blessed Trinity. All Three Divine Persons of the Trinity are in a continual dance of reciprocal self-giving. Each gives fully to the Others – honor, love, glory, praise – and receives the same in turn. In such sharing there is no keeping score. The Divine Persons give because it is the very nature of God to give. And God expects us – in whatever ways we are able – to do likewise. “As the Father has loved me, so I also love you. Remain in my love…. This is my commandment: love one another as I love you.” (Jn. 15:9, 12)
Here in our final stage of discernment the Table, the Temple and the Treasure converge. The Treasure of Self-Gift can only find its proper place within the Temple of solid, Christ-centered Relationships. These relationships, furthermore, can only be rightly ordered according to the heavenly blueprint when we have more fully explored our Table, God’s altar, of Self-Knowledge. And, rounding out the mystery, the Table is best understood when we make a gift of ourselves to another person. “Man,” the Church tells us, “…cannot fully find himself except through a sincere gift of himself.”
Is this an impossible contradiction? Not really, it’s more like a dance. Or like jumping out of a helicopter with no parachute and skiing down the side of a mountain.
Novena Prayer
Jesus says: “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called children of God.”
Pier Giorgio responds: I offer you my best wishes – or, rather, only one wish, but the only wish that a true friend can express for a dear friend: may the peace of the Lord be with you always! For if you possess peace every day, you will be truly rich.
Let us Pray: Blessed Pier Giorgio, despite your daily struggles, you found peace by fostering your own well being in work, study and play; in prayer alone and with others; in silence and in song, in laughter and in serious conversation with friends. Guide me to that inner peace which will enable me to share peace with others.
Blessed Pier Giorgio, I ask for your intercession in obtaining from God, Who is our peace, all the graces necessary for my spiritual and temporal welfare. I confidently turn to you for help in my present need:
(in your own words, ask for the Lord to give you greater gratitude for the graces and gifts you have received from him.)
A Book of Prayers in Honor of Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati, by Rev. Timothy E. Deeter
Make it My Own
Daily Discernment Workbook
WORLD VIEWS
1. My Choice
Our age is not about self-gift. We’re more about self-actualizing, but the language we use often fools us. Terms like “choice” and “self-discovery” give a respectable cover to a more self-centered aim. Gloria Steinem, a feminist author and activist, said the following about her own decision not to become a mother. Reflect on her response and try to detect in the seemingly self-effacing explanation Steinem’s own view of self-gift in motherhood.
Interviewer: Do you ever wonder what your life would have been like if you'd gotten married and had children?
Steinem: Sometimes I'm not sure I would have been strong enough to have children, to live that life, and to come out the other end with an identity of my own. Many people I went to high school with were strong. They had children, went back to school, went back to work, even ran for office. I greatly admire every woman who's a single parent, who's poor and survives it. They deserve a medal. The way I came to think of it was that I could not give birth to both myself and someone else. It was a choice [2].
A World of Difference. What are three differences in attitude I see between Steinem’s statement and the teaching of Vatican II about finding oneself:
“…man…cannot fully find himself except through a sincere gift of himself.” (GS #24 cited above)
1.
2.
3.
What would Jesus say? Compare Steinem’s understanding of self-discovery/choice with Jesus’ teaching on sacrifice:
Amen, amen, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains just a grain of wheat; but if it dies, it produces much fruit. (Jn. 12:24)
What do I think Jesus would lovingly say to Ms. Steinem in response to her statement?
EXAMINE MY HEART
2. Back to the Table
Having refreshed my memory on the Table of Self-Knowledge, I may find it helpful to reflect once again on the central question of self-knowledge: who do I hate? Remember, this does not mean we see strong, negative emotions as ‘okay,’ but we do find in them a useful sign of a deeper disturbance. Identifying the disturbance sheds light on what grounds my Sense of Self, Source of Love or Hope of Happiness. It also may reveal something about my History of Hurts or my Habits of Sin. With this in mind, I close my eyes and ask the Lord to lead me back to any distressing reactions I’ve had to people or situations over the past few weeks.
First, I recall the specific circumstances and ask for light from the Holy Spirit.
Second, I try to figure out what was the matter? Is it evident what bothered me about the situation or person?
Third, I ask the Holy Spirit: Was there something deeper going on? Was my reaction in proportion to the trouble and/or person or was it extreme? If so, why? What was threatened in me?
Below I write any insights:
If I can think of other examples – other strong, negative reactions to people or situations (hint: it may be the one that’s distracting me so I can’t do this exercise right now) I take a look at each using the same process and write my thoughts below or in my journal.
Conclude with
“Glory be to the Father,
and to the Son,
and to the Holy Spirit.
As it was in the beginning,
is now, and ever shall be.
World without end, Amen.”
[0] lead quote - Pirates of the Caribbean, Walt Disney Pictures, 2003
[1] Gaudium et Spes #24, Pastoral Constitution on the Church in the Modern World
[2] Modern Maturity Magazine, May/June issue, 1999