Day 11. Silence

Part 2: A Table

Sep 30

*God is the friend of silence – we need to listen to God because it’s not what we say, but what he says to us and through us that matters.*
Mother Teresa

Return in your mind’s eye to that square surface we discussed yesterday. You are still floating over the vast, sandstorm that stretches to the horizon. As you stand at the center of the flat area, what do you hear? The roar of the gale underneath? No, I suspect you don’t. In fact I’m almost positive you can’t hear anything right now. Why? Because if you’re like me, you spend a remarkable amount of effort trying to keep from hearing anything on the surface of your life. Let me explain.

How do you react to silence? I mean long periods of silence. Some people love silence, but most of us avoid it. In fact, we hate it. Not that I consciously say, “I hate silence,” but when I find things too quiet, I look for ways to generate noise. Do you carry music around with you wherever you go? In the car? At work? Walking to class? Do you keep the television on at home -- even when you’re not watching it? Do you make a habit of watching old movies over and over even though you can recite the dialogue word-for-word?

Silence isn’t the absence of noise. Silence is the presence of God. At least, it’s where we begin to discover the presence of God. When I decide to be silent, I’m making a decision about who I’m going to pay attention to. I tune out other things so I can focus on God. So silence is all about relationship. Paying attention to the most important relationship in your life. St. Faustina says, “...in order to hear the voice of God, one has to have silence in one's soul and to keep silence; not a gloomy silence, but an interior silence; that is to say, recollection in God” [1].

I know that many people experience God in their favorite music. To turn it off for even a day would be inconceivable to them. They experience the spiritual dimension of music as something that leads them toward prayer – even to what they would call deep prayer. But the dividing line between the good feelings you get from listening to your music and the authentic presence of God are going to become confused sooner or later. That’s a real problem. More than any other time in your life, you can’t afford to miss the signals God is giving you right now. When you’re plugged into music, it’s easy to tune out some tough things that silence will allow you to hear. So we’ve got to do some real soul searching. Not just about music, but about all the things we use to fill up the perceived “emptiness” of silence.

The purpose of this day is to examine your media consumption. How much noise is going on in your life and how can you get it under control? There are legitimate forms of entertainment, no doubt. But we need to reject our tendency to escape from reality through movies, TV, music; our phones and our computers. By our excessive media-absorption we say, “If I’m constantly distracted by images and noise, I don’t have to look at myself.” This time of discernment depends on a reasonable level of silence. How will you create the space for it in your life?

Do a thought exercise and write down your reflections in your journal. “When I get home, my first impulse is to turn on…” Below, number the media you are most dependent upon from 1 (most dependent) to 7 (least dependent).

[ ] Music (Spotify, etc.)

[ ] Television (sports, etc.)

[ ] Streaming (TV, movies, etc.)

[ ] YouTube, TikTok, or similar online entertainment

[ ] Instagram, or other social media

[ ] Video games

[ ] Other digital dependencies: mindless time online, scrolling, surfing, shopping, trying to resurrect your crypto-currencies, etc.

Make an honest estimate of the hours you spend on each in a week (or any others not listed here). Write it down. Based on these numbers, you’ll need to come up with a plan for doing a “media-fast” during this time of discernment. One suggestion: try the 3,3,3,1 approach. That’s a decision to limit yourself to:

3 songs a day

3 hours of TV or gaming a week

3 hours of recreational internet use a week (not counting school work, etc.)

1 movie a week (in a theater or at home)

Feel free to add your own personal decisions. For example, you could decide that whenever you’re in the car, you’ll refrain from all forms of noise – radio, podcasts, audiobooks, etc.

Write your decisions down in your journal. Be attentive to other ways you generate noise in your life (excessive talking on the phone, etc.) Try to include ways of limiting those as well. In your next meeting with your Discernment Advisor, go over your decisions for a “media-fast.”

If you’re not serious about putting significant amounts of silence in your schedule, you’re not serious about discernment.

**Novena Prayer**

**Jesus says:** “Blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”
**Pier Giorgio responds:** The faith given to me in Baptism surely suggests to me that of yourself you will do nothing; but if you have God as the center of all your actions, then you will reach the goal.
**Let us Pray:** Blessed Pier Giorgio, teach me true poverty of spirit. Help me understand that God cares for me; and that He asks me, in return, to care for others, especially those in need. Guide me to make choices in my life which will show a preference for service of God and neighbor, rather than accumulating financial wealth and social advantage for myself. Give me a special love for the poor and the sick.
Blessed Pier Giorgio, I ask for your intercession in obtaining from God, Who is the Lover of the poor, all the grace necessary for my spiritual and temporal welfare. I confidently turn to you for help in my present need: (in your own words, ask for the Lord to grant peace, clarity and loving guidance in your discernment journey)
*A Book of Prayers in honor of Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati by Rev. Timothy E. Deeter*

Make it My Own

Daily Discernment Workbook

BREAK OPEN YOUR BIBLE

1. Top 10 Scriptural Reasons for Silence.

Silence makes sense and the Bible backs it up. By drawing a line (or pairing numbers with letters), match the passage with the lesson about silence it teaches below.

10. Proverbs 10:19

9. Psalm 46:11

8. 1 Kings 19:11-13

7. Psalm 131

6. Luke 2:16-19

5. Luke 1:18-20

4. Acts 7:56-58

3. Matthew 13:31-32

2. Luke 10:38-42

1. Revelation 8:1-4

A. If you open your mouth carelessly in God’s presence, he may silence you against your will!

B. God speaks softly, after the storm and earthquake.

C. A parable about how big things start small, hidden and silent.

D. Heaven is silent when God listens to us; to our prayers.

E. It is those who refuse the vision of heaven who “cover their ears.”

F. The more you talk, the more likely you are to sin.

G. Only in silent reflection and pondering can you grasp the marvelous things God is doing in your life.

H. Jesus wants our attention more than our activity.

I. In silence our souls are nurtured in God’s gentleness.

J. Stillness is where we come to recognize and confess God.

MY FAITH BUILDERS

2. Put it into practice

For 10 minutes I sit in silence using any one of the scripture passages above as a focal point. Ponder it. I won’t give up if my mind wanders. Gently I will lead my thoughts back to focus on God as often as needed. Don’t get frustrated. If all I do for 10 minutes is shepherd my thoughts back to God as they wander like sheep in many directions, I’ve had a good time of prayer.

REFLECT ON THE FATHERS

3. Dealing with Distraction

The following is a quote on dealing with distractions from one of the great spiritual classics on prayer:

I will tell you a little about two techniques for handling distractions. Try them and improve on them if you can.
When distracting thoughts annoy you try to pretend that you do not even notice their presence or that they have come between you and your God. Look beyond them – over their shoulder, as it were – as if you were looking for something else, which of course you are.
For beyond them, God is hidden in the dark cloud of unknowing. Do this and I feel sure you will soon be relieved of anxiety about them. I can vouch for the orthodoxy of this technique because in reality it amounts to a yearning for God, a longing to see and taste him as much as is possible in this life. And desire like this is actually love, which always brings peace.
There is another strategy you are welcome to try also. When you feel utterly exhausted from fighting your thoughts, say to yourself: "It is futile to contend with them any longer." and then fall down before them like a captive or coward. For in doing this you commend yourself to God in the midst of your enemies and admit the radical impotence of your nature. I advise you to remember this device particularly, for in employing it you make yourself completely supple in God's hands. And surely when this attitude is authentic it is the same as self-knowledge because you have seen yourself as you really are, a miserable and defiled creature less than nothing without God. This is, indeed, experiential humility. When God beholds you standing alone in this truth he cannot refrain from hastening to you and revenging himself on your enemies. Then like a father rescuing his small child from the jaws of wild boars or savage bears, he will stoop to you and gathering you in his arms, tenderly brush away your spiritual tears.
The Cloud of Unknowing [2]

Make it My Own How will I remind myself of this when I’m praying? How will I balance honest effort (really trying to resist my distractions) with admitting my helplessness (asking God’s help and receiving his mercy)? I write some of my thoughts below.

A QUOTE TO NOTE

4. What’s the use?

When distractions overwhelm me, I often wonder if it’s even worth it to pray. But God doesn’t see it that way. The distracted time of prayer may be the most valuable one of all. Can you guess the reason why? If not, read this quote from a spiritual master and then answer.

If prayer be a lifting up of the mind to God, then every time we turn away from distractions to renew our attention to God, we pray – and we pray in the teeth of difficulty and despite ourself. What can be more pleasing to God? – What more meritorious? We should be very greatly surprised if we could get a glimpse at the account book that the recording angel keeps, and see the different values he sets on our various attempts at prayer. The prayer that pleased us, and with which we were well satisfied, would often be quite low in his estimate, while the prayer that disgusted us, which was apparently made up of nothing but distractions, might be found to have won a very high degree of his approval.
Eugene Boylan, Difficulties in Mental Prayer [3]

Two or three takeaways Based on this quote and the one above, are there two or three resolutions I can make about the distractions that are always part of prayer?