7th Advisory Meeting
On or After the Candidate Completes Day 84
Description: The Treasure of Self-Gift is the final stage of the Novena and moves the candidate into a mode of active discernment. Before we consider how to recognize God’s voice and learn more about what vocational paths we may pursue, the first part of this section focuses on motives. Gratitude, magnanimity and the recognition of the gift we have received from God the Father through Jesus Christ is the seed of every authentic vocation. Our self-gift to God is a response to his prior perfect gift to us: the gift of salvation. We learn about radical self-gift and see that it’s not a question of “who is the most holy?” but rather, “who is the most grateful for the free gift of God we have received?”
The remainder of this section offers instruction in discernment. As the Novena meditations describe various ways we can hear and recognize God’s guidance, the DA has a particularly important role in helping the candidate apply the various modes of God’s communication to their own experience. The Advisor’s own experiences of hearing God along with lessons learned can be most helpful at this stage.
Preparation Points
1. Self-Awareness Check. You may feel a growing sense of pressure as the Novena reaches the final stages. Many candidates have high hopes that, with all their patient efforts, a clear and compelling answer will be forthcoming. I know you’ve heard this before, but if you’re like me, you need reminding. The subtle expectations and undercurrents coming at you from the candidate can exert an unspoken demand: Tell me what path I should choose! We are not here to answer this question for them. We are here to support the candidate in asking and allowing God to answer this question. And his timing can be frustrating. If the candidate is feeling frustration and placing this also on you, pray for inner peace. It is true that you are giving them feedback based on your own wisdom and observations. You may also point out where you believe a leading or a consolation is NOT from God. But anything beyond that is outside our job description. The Novena tells them as much, but you may have to remind them as well.
2. Ignatian Spirituality: a Crash Course. The 99 Days offers an overview of the Rules of Discernment set out by St. Ignatius of Loyola in the 16th century. A few short meditations can’t do justice to this great mystic’s thought, so I’ve tried to zoom in on definitions and explanations of Spiritual Consolations and Spiritual Desolations. Starting in Day 81, the candidate is invited to reflect on Ignatius’ clear and succinct descriptions of the respective inward experiences prompted in the believer by the actions of the Good (Holy) Spirit and the Evil Spirit, the devil or one of his fallen angels. As the text makes clear, this is far from a “follow your feelings” approach to discernment, but it does pay attention to certain kinds of movements in the soul that evoke feelings of spiritual well-being, as opposed to those that produce spiritual darkness, lethargy and disconnection. As you read Days 81 through 84, you may find the material sparks greater interest or a desire to understand more in-depth. If so, the writings of Fr. Timothy Gallagher, OMV (he’s also available in online video forums like YouTube), are very clear and insightful. Much of what I’ve tried to convey are based on his excellent material. The candidate is encouraged to practice a daily Examen of Consciousness (note it’s not the same as an Examination of Conscience) using a simple format proposed by St. Ignatius and reproduced in printable form on Day 82 at the end of the workbook. Feel free to print one and try it yourself in the days ahead.
3. Look Over the Closing Retreat Materials. The candidate has now made reservations (we hope!) for a closing personal 4-day or 8-day Decision Retreat. Give yourself time to look over the Decision Retreat Overview page. You’ll find links for digital or print-format versions of booklets for either duration. Pick the one compatible with the candidate’s time frame. There’s a format that can be printed front to back, folded and stapled as a booklet or, if you don’t have a printer that can do this, use the digital format (you can also print this version, one page per sheet, staple the corner and give it as a handout). Note that page-order in files formatted for booklet printing will seem random. Don’t panic! It’s supposed to be that way. Read and reflect on the materials becoming familiar with the format, but don’t share these with the candidate until the last meeting before they go on retreat. You can also look at the online guide for either the 4-day or the 8-day format. As you’ll see, this retreat is primarily an Ignatian-style series of meditations on our Lord’s passion. Note that the scripture passages for the daily meditations are NOT provided in the candidate’s retreat materials, but only in yours. Each day when you meet, you provide the passages for the next day. The purpose is to prevent the candidate from jumping ahead in the meditations. There’s no further demand on your time as director beyond that daily meeting which lasts an hour. You don’t have to give any talks or do much work apart from prayer. Your role will be to accompany the candidate and help them reflect on what they’re hearing from the Lord, especially through spiritual consolations.
4. Various Vocational Paths and How to Inform Your Candidate. By now you have a pretty good idea of the candidate’s dispositions and spirituality (a simple definition: “spirituality” refers to a person’s or group’s spiritual personality). Here are a few qualities I look for in someone whom I believe could fruitfully pursue a celibate vocation. The first quality is a consistent pattern of daily prayer. The second is a sense of calling or drawing towards priesthood/consecrated life. It may be gentle and subtle or clear and strong. It may be constant or it may come and go. It may be heart-felt and ardent or it may simply be a sense of obligation. At this stage the primary issue is, does it seem like a healthy pull? If so, you might be able to recommend communities nearby that are suited to the spirituality of your candidate. A service-oriented young person who has a passion for living with few possessions might find a visit to the Franciscans a worthwhile option. A prayerful person who loves silence and solitude could be directed toward a contemplative order. All these are in the form of suggestions only. God has many surprises for us when, for example, that out-going, life-of-the-party candidate ends up as a cloistered Carmelite or the deeply prayerful person is called to marriage. For now, we’re just assisting them and helping them consider various expressions and experiences of priesthood and religious vocations.
5. Made any visits yet? If the candidate has made visits to religious communities or to a seminary, remind them to fill out their reflections afterwards and bring the material with them to your next meeting. Again, the worksheet links are: visiting a religious community and exploring diocesan priesthood.
6. Helpful Days to Review: 77, 79-81. Day 77 offers a definition of discernment. That material is valuable to read or review. It’s also worthwhile to read Days 79 and 80. These meditations introduce eight “P” principles for recognizing God’s call. It is personal, possible, pleasing, patterned, pure, permanent and powerful. From here, the meditations turn to a more in-depth description of Ignatian Rules of Discernment. These are especially important to review since the remaining days and the Decision Retreat call for a good understanding of spiritual consolations and spiritual desolations (Day 81). Our purpose is to tap into experiences the candidate has already had in hearing God. Even if they can’t recall such experiences, the DA can offer examples from the saints or from your own life to fill out the picture. Our working assumption is that God is already speaking to the candidate as well as teaching them how to hear him. We’re simply trying to shed light on a conversation that’s already happening.
Meeting Agenda
1. The Woman with the Alabaster Jar. Luke 7:39-50 You may find it helpful to begin by reading this passage together. You can ask questions like, What do you suppose prompted her to respond to Jesus in this way? How is a person who pursues a celibate vocation similar to the woman? Who represents the ‘disapproving crowd’ in your own thoughts – those who might oppose you if you feel called to respond to Jesus in this way?
2. Disapproval of family? Explore with the candidate how their family might respond (or is already responding) to them discerning a celibate vocation? If the news has not been shared yet, Day 66 offers some thoughts about how to do this. Generally parents have a right to know a daughter or son is seriously thinking about a vocation, but how to break the news takes prayerful consideration. Discuss and decide with the candidate whether, when and how the family should be informed. Take into account things like: Is it likely that the family’s expected reaction could significantly obstruct the discernment process? Does the candidate see this discernment moving in the direction of further steps in pursuing priesthood or religious life? If it’s not at all clear, it may be best, for the time being, to keep it quiet.
The Catechism is in their corner. If parents object to a celibate vocation (or any vocation for that matter) it’s possible the candidate will have questions about the morality of following a path contrary to her or his parents’ wishes. If so, it’s often helpful to inform your directee that the Church recognizes the rights of adult children to discern and decide their own vocational path. In its treatment of the 4th commandment, the Catechism states:
When they become adults, children have the right and duty to choose their profession and state of life. They should assume their new responsibilities within a trusting relationship with their parents, willingly asking and receiving their advice and counsel. Parents should be careful not to exert pressure on their children either in the choice of a profession or in that of a spouse. This necessary restraint does not prevent them - quite the contrary from giving their children judicious advice, particularly when they are planning to start a family. CCC2230
3. Days 79 and 80. Eight “P” principles for recognizing God’s voice. Ask the candidate if they’ve experienced God communicating with them in any ways similar to those described in the “P” principles. It’s very possible they’ll draw a blank, so it might help to give examples from your own experience of hearing God (realizing that he communicates with all of us somewhat differently).
4. Ignatian Rules of Discernment – Day 81 - 84. The candidate is probably still a little unclear on applying these rules. They’ll have questions like, “How do I know which good feelings are actually God feelings?” The Workbook sections of Days 81 to 84 try to address many of these questions, so it may help to go back to those exercises and review the examples given and the conclusions they were able to reach in their responses to the questions.
5. Managing Vocations Directors and other helpful advice. As the candidate is making contact with seminaries, communities and vocation directors to set up visits, there may come a point when they feel overwhelmed. Many vocations directors are responsive without being pushy, but sometimes you get priests or religious who come on strong and put expectations on the candidate that aren’t helpful. These are the recruiters I warn about in the introductory stage of the Novena. Often they are good people in difficult positions trying to ensure the survival of their community or ministries. Please be willing to adjust expectations and help the candidate push back against overly pushy people. Being overwhelmed may also come from a sense of “Wow. This is getting real!” Urge them to pay more attention to what the Novena is teaching them about spiritual consolations and desolations and less about playing out various ideas of what the future may hold. Invite them to stay in the moment and focus on seeking God daily.
6. Speaking of visits. Ask them about any visits they’ve made to communities, seminaries, vocations or “come and see” weekends, etc. What did they learn? What was their experience of the visit? Did it leave them with a favorable or unfavorable reaction? Why? Signal them that honesty is the most important factor here and avoid any hint of prompting them towards a particular way of seeing the experience.
7. Ask about their “Inclination.” Now that the candidate is more actively considering vocational paths, it’s suitable to ask, in an initial way, where they’re leaning. Are they feeling more inclined toward a religious/priestly vocation or more disinclined? Their inclination/disinclination is just a preliminary check-in with no expectations. It serves as a preparation for the more in-depth reflection they’ll undergo when they fill out their preparatory worksheet for the Decision Retreat at the end of the Novena. Caution the candidate against settling on this inclination as their final decision. There will be other factors to consider, but opening up conversation in this area is a good place to start.
8. Novena Commitments. If you haven’t checked in a while, you can go over the 9 Novena Commitments to find out whether the candidate is staying strong. If there has been any wavering, encourage them to renew their commitments for the final weeks of the Novena.
